You are one year old today. One whole year. You have truly been the one to teach me that so much can happen in a year. I’ve watched you go from a tiny little bundle of joy to a crazy little one year old. You have so much life in you, it’s sometimes scary but I know I’m lucky. I know I got something pretty amazing when I had you. It has been a year of growing for both of us. You learned to eat, sometimes with your hands, play with toys, wave hi and bye, nod your head yes and no, take a big girl bath, play with toys, grow teeth, chew with those teeth, roll over, sit up on your own, stand and balance on your own, play nicely with the dog, up until last week whenyou took your first EXCITING steps. And I learned how to have patience. I’ll be honest when I say that it wasn’t easy. This has truly been the hardest year of my life but you have also made it the happiest. You were worth every second of crying and trying to figure you out. You were worth every sacrifice I could have made. You were worth the sleepless nights and long days. You taught me how to be an adult and you forced me to grow up. And even now, as you become more interactive every day and learn so much more, you’re reminding that life is still fun and it’s not worth being serious all the time.
We’re both still figuring it out. Like how I’m trying to figure out how to teach you to not bite me without raising my voice and you’re still getting a hang of the walking thing but that’s what has me so excited right now. That this is only year one and we have so much ahead of us and there’s so much we need to do together! But I’m going to need time to slow down because I haven’t stopped crying thinking about how fast time is going now and I need you to be my little girl forever. And I’m going to need you to need me and even when you don’t, maybe you can pretend to or something. Because this is who you’re always going to be to me, and even someday when you’re 28, I’ll look at you and still remember the moment you were born and I held you in my arms and I thought about the person you would someday grow up to be. And I looked at your confused little newborn face and I felt like my heart was going to explode with all the love I had for such a new little human being.
Lately I’ve been thinking about the beginning, about when I met your dad and we made plans for our life together and we talked about having a baby. It’s funny to think back in those moments now because I feel like you were always there waiting for us and waiting to be a part of our life. There was nothing before. First your father and I had each other and then we had you and then we had everything. Happy birthday, my beautiful little girl. I love you, I love you, I love you.